Sometimes I think I’m my own worst enemy.
Then I calm down and realize it’s my evil twin from Earth-2, and only you and I can stop him.
3 Fan Communities That Hate Their Own Members -
At some point the fans of these communities decided it was up to them to prevent new people from joining them at all costs.
I wrote a column about how comic book and music fans hate their fellow enthusiasts more than anything else in the entire universe. To wit - I embedded a YouTube clip of one of my songs, purely for illustrative purposes and not at all to stroke my own boundless ego, in the body of the column. Within an hour of this article going live, I got a personal message on YouTube (a personal message, mind you, because I had disabled comments and made the video unlisted so the only way you can watch it is by getting the link through my column) that said “Your song is a true piece of shit. You have no talent whatsoever.” Hating it was not enough - this person literally could not go on with his or her life without personally letting me know that I didn’t deserve to make music.
Who should win a Webby for Online Film & Video / Best Writing? Vote now. -
Hey, Cracked After Hours is up for a Webby for Best Writing. Please help us win by voting!
Meaningful lives are like assholes. Everyone has one except for you and the crack baby born at 4am downtown last night.
Having to explain a joke is like going to prom with your sister
Vilkommen, Herr Prada.
After many months of auditioning, I finally got it. Today, I am a Cracked columnist. I’ve got a banner and everything. (Banner made by Winston Rowntree). Here it is…
My first article is a non-list thing about my love for a terrible movie, Hudson Hawk, and the important lesson taught to me by my blind love of said shitty movie. It’s called:
One Valuable Life Lesson Hiding in One of the Worst Films
Enjoy it, and I hope you enjoy the many more columns to come.
This is the greatest spice supplier in America -
San Francisco Herb Co. provides wholesale pricing on bulk spices, herbs, teas, potpourri and other gourmet, organic products.
My cook’s heart is dancing right now.
This is so true, it’s rather painful.
One day i will run into David Malki, and on that day I will buy him beer in—O, sir! Such quantity as you shan’t believe.
I devised the 5 Products Men Didn’t Know They Need today. It was fun. I’ve missed Photoshop shenanigans.
dawwwww…but I just noticed that typo of the dropped space.
April Fools! The joke is on you! This isn’t really your life! We’ve all just been messing with you. You’re actually way better than this.